My head exploded today. Imagine a burst Cadburys' Cream Egg, except on my body. Like, a strawberry flavoured one. Better still, think of stamping on a tomato, a giant, head sized tomato with a human body attached. If you can't quite imagine it go do it for real on the nearest tomato-headed person. Trash it with feel and gusto. Make it feel good. Make it feel right.
I'll give you a second to stamp properly. Think of it as blood to make the imagery work properly.
Hey, that's my head, you bastard.
In other words a pretty shitty day. By the time I got to my friends house I was kinda down, so ended up being rather boring company.
I mean, it was difficult enough for me to socialise, having a tomato for a head n'all, but a burst tomato? Damn near impossible. Still had a good time, but rotten fruit is smelly.
Wow, you didn't expect that did you. My blog can be educational as well as ridiculously entertaining. Tomato is indeed a fruit, not a vegetable. Thanks Wardy.
Cor, I like this new factual blog thing, it's like I'm helping the world or something.
The exact geographical centre of the United States is Lebanon.
(Lebanon, Kansas :))
It is against the law to whale hunt in Oklahoma (think about it...).
I'm bored of being even more awesome than usual now, though if I'm honest it's pretty revolutionary, I mean did you seriously think it was possible?
I can answer that for you.
Of course, I'm just the guy with the tomato for a head and juice for brains. Fortunately the internet protects me from your complete realisation of me. (Pumpkins for balls, cucumber for cock.)
I'm very good at writing things no one actually wants to read. Probably because no one actually reads this. Anyway, I'm bored with the entire fruity theme. Though I was seriously considering giving in to popular demand and picking up the Cream Egg analogy, I'll take pity and leave.
Okay, so I haven't mentioned what's been causing spontaneous fruit combustion, nor will I. Trust me when I say you don't want to know. Erm, in other news me and a friend got through a bottle of Disaronno last night, wrote a TeAm BloG, click the follower tagged Ethan on this page to view it. It's... different. :D. Bear with my blog people, it's getting kinda crap, I'll try to post again soon when I can think of something vaguely interesting.
Then again, not being able to think of anything interesting has never stopped me before.
PEACE X
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