BY JOVE!
Apparently somewhere in the world that saying still flys, so I'm getting my fill now.
BY JOVE!
My torturous attempts at squeezing things like that into conversation end up pretty shit, even though EVERYTHING I say is held in raptures by EVERYONE, of course. So it's in a blog. The classic four-part blog title list is once again a last resort, what with it being the beginning of my blog aswell this is basically akin to hell. Hell spent with the go compare man, Micheal Winters and BARRY SCOTT, the guy who used to do the CILLIT BANG adverts.
Sorry about the capitals everywhere dudes, I know it makes for laborious reading, but you try saying BARRY SCOTT or CILLIT BANG without shouting. :D
Apparently massive fornication can lead to confusion :S.
Anyway, back to the list, starting, as the list dictates, with 'Numbers'. You know what? Fuck the list. How dare it tether this post to something logical. Woo, revolution, extreme liberalism. Sex.
Part 3: Crash Bandicoot.
I'll assume you're also watching Casanova again? Good. It's pretty shit. Really doesn't have much to do with what I plan on writing, but this needs filling out and that's where I got the fornication quote from. Unsurprisingly it describes me quite well. The very first level of the very first Playstation game I, Aaron Warden, ever played was called 'N. Sanity beach'. Like, that's the location. Two years later I got the joke... the literal 'northern sanity beach' and phonetic 'insanity beach'. Genius :D. As an 8 year old I giggled for days. At the start of this level, Crash Bandicoot (a bi-pedal vole-looking creature with wannabe human issues and some sweet sweet skills) shouts 'WA-HA', something I've adopted over the last few days with much contempt and headaches caused for all. I do my bit :). That is genuinely all that story was heading towards, you don't like it, fuck a fucktard fucktarded...ly. :)
It's insane how quickly I can switch between joyful and insultive. Maybe I'll be a serial killer.
Part 2: Weed.
Yeah yeah, I'm building up to the 'me-getting-arrested-for being-too-badass' post. Stick with it, it'll go soon. Like herpes or syphilis probably. Back to the important issues of the week: weed. This part should probably be just before the hardened criminal bit, kinda ties in, but that'd be sensible so what's the point? Some guy walked up to me and asked if I had any weed. I said no (sadly that is the truth, boys and girls) and carried on standing there. He didn't really move away, so I asked why he thought I had weed, which now, looking back, was a pretty odd decision. Though I did feel like I'd let him, myself and the human race down in some way, less shenanigans I guess, so I thought I owed him a conversation. He said I looked the type, decided I wasn't lying and moved off. A random tramp-ish addict decided I was 'One of them' and would probably drag them up to a fucking high. Bastard. My making gormless faces into random crowd days are over, though I'd quite like to meet a nice someone who loves to share and be with me :). Oh, share weed and smoke weed. With me. That is all.
:D
I've just realised what I'm going to do.
You're not going to like it.
:D
I've changed the post title and everything now, I honestly wasn't planning on doing this but it's getting pretty long. This is only part one. You'll have to wait until the next post for the thrilling conclusion and how I got arrested. Maybe if I keep building it up it'll be even more of a disappointment.
That is the sound of inevitability. It's the sound of your death. Goodbye, (insert name or (if you can think of a super cool alias) super cool alias) here.
Matrix is good, I'm good, Life's good. I think that covers everything :).
PEACE X
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